Never Assume

Dear Doctor,

Pap smears aren't supposed to be that painful. It shouldn't have made me cry and scream in a way I've never heard myself scream before. It shouldn't have been the most traumatic moment of my life. You shouldn't have kept going.

Afterwards you asked, "Does it hurt that much during sex?" I said, "I've never had sex before." You were shocked, embarrassed.

"Oh, I assumed you had since you've been with your boyfriend for so long."

You shouldn't have assumed. You shouldn't assume anything.

You should have stopped when I screamed. You should have communicated. You should have asked.

Please promise me you'll never assume anything about your patients again, especially when it comes to their sexual health.

Sincerely,

Anonymous, USA

“I Can’t Find Your Cervix!”

Dear retroverted uterus,

Why? Just why?

You have made my life so much harder for no reason. I have always had horrifically painful periods and was on the pill for 6 years straight and so I had the hormonal coil inserted a couple of years ago when I was 17. Luckily, it was inserted during a laparoscopic surgery investigating endometriosis, which was deemed inconclusive. So this meant I was under general anesthetic and didnt feel a thing- perfect! When I came round, the was no mention of my retroverted uterus on the notes just that the coil had been inserted.

Flash forward to a month or two later, to my examination at the GPs to find to my horror that the pelvic exam HURT LIKE CRAZY! I had been told it would be uncomfortable but not agonising like I was experiencing. I had never had sex before so it was extremely scary to begin with, let alone the fact it was really painful. The lovely nurse discovered I had a retroverted uterus, that was somehow not picked up but she could not find my cervix to check if the coil was in the correct place. It took half an hour with me writhing on the table, only for her to say "I really can't find it, I can't find where your cervix is". I was sent away with the advice that it was probably in the right spot and once I have sex for the first time, it will be much easier and less painful.

So thanks to you Uterus, I have a coil situated somewhere in my body, and the expectation and pressure to have sex so I can be in less pain during examinations. Thanks a lot.

Signed, your unhappy friend,
Freya

Freya, UK